Lard
I haven't been able to post much lately due to work (out of the office in my car all day) and also because I've been hiding under my bed and crying since finding out that I am now taking XXL clothing at Marks and Spencer. It really is quite depressing being told by a clothes label - "jeesus! You must be one fat f**cker! "
The thing is - I'm not! I'm not fat at all. But these days I can hardly find anything on the high street that fits me. It took a while around my 30's to come to terms with the fact that I can no longer buy clothes in Topman, and now at age 31 I've been reduced to foregoing fashion altogether and buying my sweaters in M&S. Soon I'll be wearing one of those huge grey dress-like t-shirts and shorts and undulating along the road like a wet lump of clay on a potter's wheel.
Although.... for some reason, my size has remained the same in expensive designer clothing...Which leads me to construct a conspiracy theory that states that clothes sizes are becoming progessively smaller now that all our clothing is manufactured in china and the far east, where the tiny factory workers can't comprehend the bloated size of us western infidels. Designer clothes made in europe seem to have not been affected by this oriental miniturisation. Am I the only one that this affects - or are others noticing this? Or is it simply a case of just coming to terms with the fact that I may be softening and spreading like an over-ripe brie?
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